Kill Yourself Please and Thank You

Current list of people that should grace death with their presence.

1. Gum Slingers

Let me just say that i hate chewed up gum.  Like more than Glenn Beck hates black people. I loath that people cant keep their bacteria in their mouth.  Its disgusting so in accordance with this.  If you are disgusting enough to have an issue with finding a trash can when your done chewing and think its okay to stick on  stuff so someone can come along an accidently get caught up in your DNA... please kill yourself... it would seriously make the world a better place.  If you cant even throw your gum in the trash or shit even swallow it, then who know what else you'll leave laying around. I bet your the random used condom in the road culprit.   O yeah and if you leave your gum on a plate for your servers to clean, kill yourself twice, or in a humiliating way like a masturbation choke accident. 

Also, for people that smack their gum so loud i can barely think.  In general anything uber repetitive besides sex can be annoying.  So you and your cow mouth and kill yourself also, i don't like reading my book on the metro to your gum percussion, its gross and rude and distracting and i hope you chew gum n the bathroom bc now you have other people DNA in your mouth (gum collects things), chow down asshole.  I wish for these people to die final destination style... i hope you blow a bubble so big it pops in your face blinds you long enough for you to slip into the street and repetitively get hit by cars.


2. Barnes and Nobles

Who ever thought that putting Native American books in the same section as the very tiny AFRICAN-AMERICAN section please please kill yourself.  Its an insult to think that our plight is anything near the same.  I mean what the fuck. There are 8 thousand books on your damn American History section which lets be honest is mostly made up bullshit.  So take a few of the crap Thanksgiving books, Thomas Jefferson and his "love affair", Lincoln loves the slaves books and give Native Americans their own section.  Okay so were similarly because US Colonials fucked us in the ass with no lube, but that doesn't mean we should share a section. Its not a therapy session. Grouping us in one category is insensitive and just rude.  Shit i have more African American books in my house than B&N has in that section.  So I think whomever did this section should get Shot with an Arrow while being hanged, how's that for irony.