So reasons i will probably die alone and happy.
1. BLACK WOMAN - For the purpose of dating, I'm a black women which comes with its own type of stereotypes because despite growing up in a white household. I am told i still have the black women, no nonsense attitude and to the majority men... that means I'm difficult and hard to deal with, if you don't believe me there are plenty charicatures of me "angry black woman" in TV, movies and commercials. There are men that appreciate this but did you hear, black women like that can’t get a husband. We can just forget that it’s this type of strength that kept the black people going, through slavery and the civil rights but who's counting such things. So I’m just going to use my "black woman" attitude to get what i want out of life.
2. EMOTIONALLY IMPOTENT - I can’t get it up when i need it but it likes to pop up at times when not needed. I kind of have a dude mentality. I can be the best gf ever (and have been) but why and to who. Who are you to deserve my all. I was in a relationship with what is perhaps my soul mate for 6 years and he screwed that up so....i tried twice after that and not only did the two others stomp on my heart but they threw it in the octagon with Brock Lesner. So now anytime things get to close i back off ...that and my complete loathing of cuddling and hand holding... I’m pretty much a dude. However this impotence helps me in never being stuck in a bad marriage which let’s be honest is worse than single. O that and i can (safely) do who i want when i want and have the bed to myself.
3. HIGH STANDARDS - i am not asking for perfection I’m asking for bare minimums, bring to the table what i bring so we can be equals. If you’re in your 30s, have no job, no path, huge amounts of debt, a bunch of kids and no passion than you’re not for me and that’s okay. That and i need you to be a man....there are so many man-bitches out here i cant stand it. I’m also not into changing people because if you don’t love my crazy you don’t love me. I won’t try to change you if you don’t try to change me. Settling is never a good thing and how can you be happy with something you never really wanted.
What it comes down to is why settle ....just to not be alone. I have a great life with wonderful people, a good job, volunteer work i enjoy and goals. Why complicate that if unnecessary. If i find someone that is worth my emotions I’m all in, but I’m sick of seeing people in horrible relationships trying so hard to make everyone believe they are happy. Your FB statuses aren’t fooling anyone.
My friends are convinced i won’t die alone and if not that's cool but if i do at least i can say i lived my life to the fullest and I’m happy.
